Coffee Snobs

My little sister was asking me the other day what I wanted for Christmas. As she was previously employed as a barista, one would think that a request for fresh coffee would hardly be an unreasonable request; and yet, she informed me I am now one of those rare and exotic breeds, the snooty and uppity 'coffee snob.' I don't know what happened... I'm sure I used to be just the usual sort of snob. Sure, I may look down on people who think there is an 'e' in grammar, or those who frequently mangle idioms like 'one fall swoop' or 'for all intensive purposes', or just have red hair -- but come now, really, who doesn't? It's not like I blame them. Not everyone can be born with such insight, cunning, intellect, charm, and of course, good looks (let alone modesty and selflessness). No, I don't blame them at all, I just don't feel like it's my fault that I am better than them. This coffee snob business though, that's a whole different story. How can they just label me and make these gross over-generalizations? Just because I can taste the subtle nuançes and detect the complex aromas of a well cultivated and roasted bean... how dare they? If their palates were as refined and discerning as mine they'd roast their own beans, vacuum-seal them, and grind them fresh for each delightfully delectable brew too; anything less would just be... uncivilized.